Everything a New Mom needs to know!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taDqKWWPDAY&feature=player_embedded

TRUST YOURSELF

Help with a New Baby - A great Shower or Grandparent Gift!

As a postpartum doula, I am charging new parents an hourly rate to help them out with their new babies.  While my rates are very reasonable, it is not always easy for parents to find the extra cash to pay for more than a few hours.

So  instead of buying new moms expensive and (sometimes) unnecessary gifts for the baby, offer to contribute towards a postpartum doula.  The hours a postpartum doula spends with the mom help her to take care of herself and better bond with her new baby. For more about my services see the  postpartum services section of this blog.

Before giving this gift it is good to ask to check with the mother and see if this is something she wants.  Also, if you are a pregnant woman looking for support with your new baby, ask your friends and family if they would be willing to contribute towards a postpartum doula, instead of buying you more conventional gifts.  New grandparents who live in a different city may be especially interested in contributing.

We can put together a gift package that includes a gift certificate for the new mom that tells her how many hours she gets and who has given the gift.  Please get in touch with me about arranging a gift for your favourite new mom (or mom-to-be) today.

This is an excellent book for new moms.  Very honest
about the highs and lows of new motherhood, easy to read and full of useful information.

Support for New Parents

This past weekend, I completed my training as a post-partum doula with DONA and I am now able to offer this type of support to families in the Lethbridge area.

A post-partum doula is trained and experienced in meeting a new family’s needs for household help, meal preparation, advice and assistance with newborn care and feeding, and allowing time for the new mother to rest.” (From Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn, 5th edition).

BASIC POST-PARTUM SUPPORT PACKAGE

• One meeting during the pregnancy to determine post-partum support needs
• 8 hours of support at your home, which could include:
• Breastfeeding support
• Discussing the birth experience
• Light cleaning, laundry and meal preparation
• Cloth diapering and baby-wearing support
• Photographing the baby
• Preparing birth announcements (additional fee applies)
• Other support as requested
• Connect you with useful community resources, books and articles

Support up to 3 months (additional fees apply)

please feel free to contact me at 403-524-1721 or emcolver@gmail.com for more information.

MAKES A GREAT GIFT FOR NEW PARENTS

So Many Things

It has been ages since I have done a post, and I have about 3 0r 4 in my head that I have been wanting to put down.

DONA presented a great workshop for doulas in Lethbridge on May 1st called Politics, Boundaries and Change, which dealt with so many of the issues that doulas face interacting with the hospitals, other doulas and creating a good reputation for the profession in communities. I think I am going to address some blogs directly to some of these issues in the future, but in the meantime, check out the blog Doula Speak of Sheri Deveney, who was one of our awesome trainers and addresses these issues and more extremely well. I look at someone like Sheri, her wisdom and sense of humour, huge knowledge and understanding and I think - that is where I want to be in 15 years. I especially appreciate that she knows what her strengths and weaknesses are and is constantly self-reflecting. And she allows herself to be vulnerable. Just seeing her work as a trainer is pretty amazing, I imagine seeing her work as a doula would be even more so.

At the workshop we talked about making assumptions about what other people think based on offhand comments. I have heard some negative comments about medical professionals, but I plan to reserve judgement, not only until I have interacted with them myself, but even after that, not taking comments personally and always believing that opinions can be changed.

I don't think that it is realistic to expect every doctor and nurse to be a strong advocate for doulas. They often have no idea what we really do, and that is not their fault as many have had little or no exposure to doulas (especially true in Southern Alberta, I am sad to say). I think that by sharing information with those who are interested and by supporting our clients in a manner that is respectful, professional and caring will we eventually get to a place where more medical professionals understand and value what we do. But that will literally take years. And it will be led not by us, but by the pregnant women who are seeking out doula services.

Another thing we learned in the workshop is that a doula is not an equal member of the 'birth team' and will alway have less power than the medical staff and that it is okay, our job is to support our client, not have our egos stroked to feel 'as good as' a doctor. I am going to wait to go into in more detail on this one once I experience being a doula in a birth situation, but it is important to keep in mind before then. It doesn't help my clients for me to assume that the health professionals are hostile and don't want me there. Likely, the medical staff don't have much opinion about it one way or the other. If they are supportive of doulas, then great. If they don't appreciate what I do, my job is to change their point of view, not through my words, but through my actions. And it will take a long time.

Practice as a Post-Partum Doula (Part 2)

I arrived (with 11 month old Julie) in Kamloops on Saturday, February 27th, just a few days after Anne’s birth. Aside from stitches from a tear, Abigail was doing great as a mom, breastfeeding was well established, with not too much discomfort. This was different than my own experience, where I struggled with establishing a good latch and lots of discomfort. Fortunately, I had great support from La Leche League which contributed to the excellent breastfeeding relationship that Julie and I now have.

Abigail had no interventions and no pain medications during labour. Although they did not have a birth doula, the nurses at the Kamloops hospital had been supportive and encouraging during labour. My experience and that of people that I talk to suggest that there are at least as many great hospital staff out there as not so great, and that while it is easy to be critical, as parents and doulas, we really need to applaud those people who help in preserving the birth space for the mother, even while they are ensuring the health of mother and baby.

I arrived on Saturday, and my brother went back to work at 5:30 a.m. Monday morning. My biggest challenge with my lovely sister-in-law was convincing her to let me help. Abigail is an extremely competent, strong, hard-working person and we had a lot of exchanges that went like this:

Me: “What can I do to help?”
Abigail: “Nothing. I will definitely get that laundry folded, unload the dishwasher, sweep the floor, etc...”
Me: “Why don’t you just hang out with the baby and I will do that stuff?”
Abigail: “But I need to feel like I accomplished something today.”
Me: “You did, you fed and changed the baby...”

After a couple of days, I was allowed to make meals, do the grocery shopping, do dishes and vacumn. I even made my mom’s signature chocolate chip cookies. And I held baby Anne or kept an eye on her while Abigail showered and rested.

We also spent time talking about the birth experience and laughing about how different the expectations and reality can be. I think birth is something that you can never truly be prepared for, no matter how much you read or how many stories you hear. I definitely talked about my birth experience, but tried to make sure that Abigail was the central focus.

The other thing I remembered from my experience (and read about too) is how emotional a new mother can feel. When my baby was a couple of days old, I remember sitting at the kitchen table, sobbing about how fortunate she is compared to so many children in the world. Abigail and I had a similar conversation, where we both ended up crying and feeling pretty lucky at the same time.

Thanks to Abigail and Ben, for letting us share in the first week of Anne’s life.

All information used with express permission.

Practice as a Post-Partum Doula (Part 1 of 2)

“A post-partum doula is trained and experienced in meeting a new family’s needs for household help, meal preparation, advice and assistance with newborn care and feeding, and allowing time for the new mother to rest.” (From Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn, 5th edition).

Me as post-partum doula, holding the baby while my sister-in-law takes a shower.

On February 24, 2010 my brother Ben and his partner Abigail had their first baby, Anne. She weighed a healthy 8 lbs, 4 oz at birth and was born in the Kamloops hospital, naturally, with few complications.

This was great for me, because along with becoming an Aunt and having a new cousin for my little one, Julie, it was one of the first times in my life that I got to be the one in a position of support. As the little sister, growing up I was always used to doing things second. But in this instance I was able to use the experience I gained by having Julie last year to be in a position to help.

I am calling this post ‘Practice’ as a post-partum doula, because although I am a trained birth doula, I have not yet been trained as a post-partum doula. I am hoping to take the training in Lethbridge at the end of May.

It strikes me that, like a birth doula, training is not necessarily the most important element in providing post-partum support. Like a birth situation, being able to read the environment, and helping the mom in the way that she needs to be helped is the key. It is all part of preserving the space. This is just as important after the birth as during the birth process.

Sometimes family members can be in a great position to support the new parents (as I was in this case), but what about when there is no family available, or if the family and the new parents have different philosophies about how to parent? That is where a doula can be extremely useful. A good doula should be concerned with helping the parents to have the environment that they want, allowing them to rest and helping to increase their confidence (if they are first time parents).

In my next post, I will write about what specific kinds of things I help Abigail and Ben with.

All information used with express permission

What is a doula?

What is a doula?

from DONA International

The word "doula" comes from the ancient Greek meaning "a woman who serves" and is now used to refer to a trained and experienced professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and just after birth; or who provides emotional and practical support during the postpartum period.

Studies have shown that when doulas attend birth, labors are shorter with fewer complications, babies are healthier and they breastfeed more easily.

A Birth Doula

* Recognizes birth as a key experience the mother will remember all her life
* Understands the physiology of birth and the emotional needs of a woman in labor
* Assists the woman in preparing for and carrying out her plans for birth
* Stays with the woman throughout the labor
* Provides emotional support, physical comfort measures and an objective viewpoint, as well as helping the woman get the information she needs to make informed decision
* Facilitates communication between the laboring woman, her partner and her clinical care providers
* Perceives her role as nurturing and protecting the woman's memory of the birth experience
* Allows the woman's partner to participate at his/her comfort level